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Dealing With Others' Sin
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Luke 17:1-4, "Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offences
will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come! It were better for him that
a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should
offend one of these little ones. Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass
against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against
thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying,
I repent; thou shalt forgive him."
Often in helping people get to the root of their problems, they will find roots
of bitterness. People will always be people. People are imperfect. People hurt others.
They use the hurt they have experienced to hurt others. The Bible clearly tells
us to forgive. Our text says when someone does you wrong, you are to rebuke them,
and if they repent, you are to forgive them. I think you would also agree that other
places in the Scripture teach us if they do not repent, we are still to forgive
them. In fact verse 4 uses the number 7 which is the number of completion, stating
that if a person trespass 7 times a day - forgive them.
Recently, I was trying to help a friend who was trespassed against. So often, the
path of least resistance is chosen, and this is one of those cases. It was easier
for the individual to cover his feelings than to follow the admonition of the Bible.
I want you to think with me about rebuke, forgiveness, and rebuking again today.
If a brother trespass against thee, rebuke him. Don't talk about them; talk to them.
Don't gossip; confront. You can talk to God. "God, please open their heart. Open
my heart. Give me the words to say. Give them the ears to hear." You can talk to
God about it. It may be okay to seek wise counsel from one person. A good question
might even be, "How do you think I should do this in a way that is holy and helpful?"
Do not use the electronic media (email, text, voicemail) as a way to confront them;
it is a cowardly way to deal with heart issues. Confront them. Look them eyeball
to eyeball, have a blend of mercy and truth, and obey the Scriptures concerning
offence and trespass.
I believe this starts early in the child rearing process with parents as our kids
are learning to respond correctly to trespass and offence. So many times the parent
will rebuke others in authority when a child, in their opinion, was mistreated.
Be very careful as parents to stay together with authority! I grew up in the days
that when I did something wrong at school, I got in trouble at home. My parents
never marched me to the school and defended me to others in my chain of authority.
They worked together with my other authority, pulling on the same rope to help me.
There were times that they coached me to go to someone in authority that had offended
me or trespassed, and I went with the right spirit. Every time the misperception
was cleared up, and we continued forward in the work of the Lord. I am sure in
my 46 years I have offended some and I am very sorry for each and every offence
and trespass. I am thankful for the forgiveness offered. I have seen what happens
to people who live with guilt and blame. God will balance all of that mess out if
you will follow this simple plan.
Some of you have been sinned against for years, some of you have just overlooked
and ignored it, and some of you have let it go, "because you love peace and comfort
more than you love God and that person". Some of you really need to just sit down
and say, "We're going to have to talk about this." Some of you have been bullied
for years. And this person doesn't even know they're a bully. They just think that
that's how the relationship works. And you know you're being pushed around. You
need to rebuke them. The Holy Spirit is going to tell you when this is proper, and
to whom He desires to use you to minister to. Remember this is speaking of brothers
and sisters in Christ.
Secondly, when you're dealing with someone else's sin, do forgive them. Jesus uses
that language. Several years ago, I discussed this issue of forgiveness with Dr.
David Gibbs. He said forgiveness was a legal term. It means to release. A person
who could not pay a debt can be forgiven in full. It also meant that person who
forgave would not have any right to talk to that person about the offense or debt
ever again. They were forgiven. It also meant they would not talk to others about
it, because they had released the person. They had forgiven them. It also meant
that they would not meditate on it themselves ever again - the person was released
of all damages and responsibility.
Thank God that we are forgiven of our sin debt because of the forgiveness offered
to us. We can forgive or we can become bitter. Those are the only options for those
who are victims, having been sinned against. You forgive and leave it to the Lord,
or you hold on to it and become bitter. If you do, you let them own you, control
you, and manipulate you every day for the rest of your life. And some of you will
say, "I am bitter, but I have a good reason, here's what they did." And I would
say, "You may have a good reason. Perhaps what they did was horrible, but you are
the one that is causing more damage to yourself than the offense they did to you."
Thirdly, keep rebuking and forgiving. You ever read Proverbs? One could say that
Proverbs could be much shorter, right? But Proverbs is long because sometimes it
says the same things over and over. Why? Because that's how God teaches us. We are
His children, and just as we repeat instructions to our kids, He repeats instructions
to you and me. Proverbs is God saying, "Here we go again. Let's get it right this
time."
I have a good friend, Carl, who is an Extreme Fighter. He is undefeated at the current
time. I watched his last fight on the internet recently and saw his opponent tap
out. At what point in the fight do you tap out? "I'm not forgiving you anymore.
I'm done with you. I tapped out in round three, round four, round five." Seven times
you get sinned against by the same person, in the same way, on the same day. That's
a lot. Jesus says, "Rebuke, forgive. Rebuke, forgive." If it takes seven times a
day, and seven is in the Bible the number of perfection, so He's kind of just saying
here, "Whatever it takes."
Questions to ask...today
1. Holy Spirit, is there someone that I need to forgive?
2. Holy Spirit, is there someone I need to rebuke in love today?
3. Holy Spirit, is there someone that should rebuke me today; and if so, will you
give me the opportunity to right my wrongs today?
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