Aargh..Frustrating Travel Day

I've had an enjoyable day and a half in Oneonta, NY hanging out with Dr. Lobdell, her students and various faculty members on campus while doing my Trans 101 presentation. But now it's time to say goodbye and head back to Da Ville.

I'm up and hitting the road with Dr. Lobdell at 9 AM to make the enjoyable 60 mile run west on I-88 back to Binghamton. I have an 11:00 AM EDT US Airways flight to catch that will start my journey back to Louisville and get me back here by 2:30 PM.

Or so I thought.

It rained off and on in the Oneonta area Monday along with most of the northeastern US. Little did I suspect it would cause a chain of events that would snowball into a frustrating travel day for moi.

The first clue this might be a trying travel day was arriving at a fog shrouded Edwin Link Airport around 10:10 AM. It was starting to lift from the runways, but I discovered at the check in desk that the fog had delayed my aircraft which was coming from Philadelphia.

Dr. Lobdell offered to stay, but I told her I'd be okay and sent her on her way back to Oneonta after thanking her for everything she'd and everyone else had done to facilitate my successful on campus presentation.

After clearing TSA security and losing my 4 oz. container of cocoa butter, I settled into the lobby area and awaited the arrival of our delayed airplane which was an 11:15 AM ETA.

At 11:15 we not only didn't have a plane at the gate, we find out thanks to a gate announcement that it returned to Philadelphia and canceled there. That set off a stampede for the ticket counter and I ended up tenth in line. I'm also kicking myself at this point because I'd left my cell phone in Louisville.

I'm already mentally going through my options as I await my turn. I know there's only one more flight to Philly from Binghamton and it's going to be grossly overbooked. There are only two other carriers that fly out of that airport and not only are they booked solid, one of them is weight restricted.

By the time I get to the counter I find out I've been rerouted to get to Louisville through Washington National. However, to get to Washington National, I have to catch a flight out of Syracuse first, which is 60 miles north on I-81.

The flight doesn't leave Syracuse until 3:10 PM, so the US Airways personnel call a cab to get me there. I have plenty of time to make the connection after enduring a white knuckle cab ride in a misty rain that increases in intensity as we get closer to Syracuse.

I arrive in Syracuse and have to clear TSA security again, then wait one and a half hours for my bird to arrive from Washington.

After a bumpy 52 minute flight I arrive at DCA and have to sit for another two hours because my flight to Da Ville doesn't leave until 7:40 PM. Since this is the first time I've been to Washington National since 2000, I decided to do some exploring and see what was in the food court.

That's when I discovered there was a Five Guys in the terminal and made a beeline for it. After ordering a bacon cheeseburger and fries from the friendly Ethiopian descended sister working the register, I now know after receiving that greasy brown paper bag containing my food why President Obama and everybody in DC raves about the place.

Five Guys food rocks.

Chowing down on Five Guys along with that wide ranging conversation I had with Dr, Lobdell this morning was the only righteous thing that was happening for me.

The buzzard's luck struck again after we boarded the flight. While waiting to take off a plane several spots in front of us broke down and had to be offloaded and pushed to the maintenance pad. It caused a traffic jam that delayed our takeoff 20 minutes.

I had planned to catch the TARC from the airport home and as I nervously perused the schedule discovered the bus I needed to catch in order to connect downtown was leaving the airport at 9:46 PM. We were originally scheduled to get to Louisville at 9:30 PM, but that would now take a minor miracle and the pilots exceeding Mach numbers to pull into the arrival gate at that time.

As I feared we pulled into the gate at 9:45 PM, and by the time I got off the plane and sprinted for the airport exit it was 9:50 PM, which meant that the bus was already headed off airport grounds and speeding northward towards downtown.

Next bus wasn't leaving until 11:11 PM. I decided to see if the US Airways counter was open so I could get them to spring for the cab ride home since I was now seven hours past the time I was originally supposed to get back to Da Ville.

I discovered that the counter had been closed since 7 PM.

I ride the next bus downtown anticipating that I'll be able to get a cab at the stand near 4th Street Live, but that didn't pan out either.

By this time I'm so thoroughly frustrated I just start walking home from downtown. That took another hour and I finally walk into the house at 1:05 AM.

But at least I got my exercise in, but not the way I planned it.

Let's juts hope my upcoming trip to the ATL goes a bit more smoothly.

Moni's Speaking At SUNY-Oneonta

At this moment the TransGriot is conducting her African American Trans 101 presentation in the Morris Conference Center - Le Cafe.

I'd like to thank Dr. Bambi Lobdell, the Women's and Gender Studies Department at SUNY-Oneonta, an all the people who made it possible for me to be up there today to discuss trans issues from an African descended perspective.

It will run until 9 PM EDT.

Hangin' At SUNY-Oneonta

Well good people, finally made it to the SUNY-Oneonta campus after my flight through Philly, a two hour layover, and an enjoyable one hour drive from Binghamton, NY and dinner with Dr. Bambi Lobdell.

I'm coming to you live from the Milne Library on campus now and about to head to one of Dr. Lobdell's classes to talk about a few issues.

Will chat about that experience later. But for now gotta head over there.

Leaving On A Jet Plane...To SUNY-Oneonta

After a busy Saturday in the Ville that started for me at 8 AM EDT and ended at the Fairness/ ACLU of Kentucky dinner that evening, the TransGriot is once again boarding a flight headed northeast to New York via Philadelphia. This time I'm headed to upstate New York instead of Long Island like I was back in November.

I'm actually traveling to Binghamton, NY, the closest airport to the SUNY-Oneonta campus for my presentation on the campus tomorrow night at 7 PM.

I'm looking forward to finally meeting Dr. Lobdell after months of e-mails and phone conversations and all the SUNY-Oneonta students on campus as well.

I'm planning an interesting, entertaining and informative Trans 101 discussion from a chocolate flavored viewpoint. Of course I'll be leaving plenty of time for questions and answers afterward.

If I can get to a computer while I'm up there, will tell you what's going on during my latest road trip. (No peeps, still haven't purchased a laptop yet)

See you in a few hours, Red Dragons!

Heading Back To Da Ville

After a few wonderful days back in H-town, I'm now getting back on the bus and making the return trip to Louisville.

My routing is going to be a little different from the one I took down here. I'm going through Dallas on the initial leg and after arriving there, I change buses for one departing to Memphis at 11:20 PM CST.

I change again to a Nashville bound bus after I arrive in Memphis that leaves at 9:00 AM CST on the 30th.

I make my last bus change for the run up I-65 to Louisville and arrive back in Da Ville at 5:40 PM EST.

I'm Finally Home

Well, after 23 hours, several bus transfers and 9 plus years, I'm finally standing inside the Houston city limits during the Christmas holidays.

My bus just pulled into the Greyhound station here in H-town, and I'm getting a first hand look at how much things have changed since my last trip here.

The METRORail light rail line that runs from UH Downtown through Hermann Park and the Med Center to Reliant Stadium runs right past it.

I'm going to probably take an up and down trip on the line just to give me something to do on one of my days here I'm waiting to hook up with Crys, Ness, the gang at IAH and my family.

Hoping my first time home for Christmas since 2000 will be drama free, but only time will tell.

Going Home For The Holidays

You TransGriot readers know that over the last three months I've been to Philadelphia and Long Island with another trip coming in March to upstate New York.

But this next trip is one I'm really looking forward to.

Thanks to my early Christmas gift from Polar and Dawn, I'm going home for Christmas.

For the first time since 2005 I'll be back in the Houston city limits, and for the first time since 2000 I'll be eating Christmas dinner with my blood family.

This time Greyhound will be doing the 1000 miles of driving down there and back. There's nonstop air service out of Da Vile to Houston but as you probably guessed, the fares were too high.

Either way, it's been a while since I've been back home. The July 2005 trip was for my brother's wedding. I took a few days off from work, rented a car and drove 2000 miles solo round trip through Kentucky, Tennessee, and Mississippi before hooking up with I-10 in Louisiana to what turned out to be a less than pleasant three day weekend for me.

There was drama that transpired a few hours after I arrived in H-town that I had to call people out on up to and including my brother, my new sister-in-law and the parental units. That trip also took place a few weeks before Katrina whacked New Orleans as well

But just like my 2005 trip, it's coming at a time when I've been homesick and really needed a change of scenery. I'm hoping the weather is relatively nice during the week I'm there and running around town.

It's also coming at a crossroads time in my life as well.

I'll have 23 hours to do some hard solid thinking about that. I'm just ready to go home, visit my family and friends and see what's transpired in the Bayou City since I left.

And there's some Creole seasoned chicken on Scott Street calling my name as well.

Moni's Excellent LI Adventure

I had the honor and pleasure of being the keynote speaker for the LITDOR on Sunday. Even though the invitation was extended months in advance, by the time the actual date approached I was ready for another trip out of Da Ville.

I usually don't like flying the day of my speaking engagements because as a former airline employee, I am intimately familiar with ATC delays and how capricious they can be at times. Air travel can be stress inducing enough without adding the concern that you're going to be delayed for an event you are the one of the participants in, but it worked out this time.

I crawled out of bed at 4 AM to get ready for my flight and when I was satisfied, I woke Dawn up at 4:55 AM to drop me off at the airport. My flight wasn't leaving until 6:10 AM and I already knew from the Bryn Mawr trip that the checkpoint doesn't open until 5:30 AM.

Got checked in at the US Airways counter and as I was clearing the security checkpoint I set off the alarm. I'd forgotten to take off my belt, which has a large metal buckle.

I take it off and as a precaution took off my earrings as well. Once again as I walk through I hear the annoying beep again, and realize at that moment it's the underwire bra I'm wearing that was the culprit. I ended up getting hand wanded and pat down searched by a friendly female TSA officer before I could proceed to my gate.

I finally get to the gate as my regional jet flight is boarding, so my timing is perfect despite the unexpected extra time I spent clearing TSA security. Once I get settled in my seat I pulled out my speech and started reviewing and making corrections to it as we pushed off the gate to begin my airborne journey to Philadelphia and my subsequent connecting flight to Islip.

Had a beautiful late fall morning with a beautiful sunrise as we streaked eastward with plenty of visibility. As we crossed the Appalachian Mountains it got a little bumpy and the cloud cover started thickening up below us. I also noted the thick blanket of snow that had been dropped in some parts of the mountains as we got closer to Philly.

We landed and I made my way to my connecting gate. I noted that this Islip leg was going to be on a Dash-8 turboprop, and the last time I'd flown one of those was on the Pittsburgh-Lexington return leg of my trip back home to bury my grandmother in 2002.

I'm a jet fan, be they regional or big birds. I detest turboprops because of the noise, and to make matters worse my seat was right by the engines.

I also knew we were going to be flying for a few minutes of the flight over the Atlantic Ocean before landing in Islip. While I'm blessed with many talents, swimming isn't one of them.

The flight was uneventful but I was nervous from the time the New Jersey shoreline receded from my view until I saw the welcome sight of the southern Long Island coastline.

We finally land at MacArthur International in Islip and Eileen is there to greet me as I exit into the airport's lobby area. After checking in to my nearby hotel and dropping off my bags we went on a mini tour of Long Island.

My flight arrived early, so Eileen and I had two hours to kill before we met the rest of the LITDOR gang at a restaurant in Centerpoint. I ended up taking a little stroll down the Jones Beach Boardwalk, discussing various trans political and other issues with Eileen before we took off for the restaurant.

We also ended up on the iconic Long Island Expressway for a few minutes and I chuckled when we passed the Amityville exit before we walked into the restaurant a little after 1 PM.

The restaurant was in some rolling, forested hills next to a picturesque lake framed with fall foliage. The food was great but my positive mood took a hit a few minutes later.

I'm the only African-descended person at the table with a group of twenty people and one of the waiters has a pronoun problem only with moi. First time is an accident, second time is deliberate, and the third time after I've advised you not to do so is a major indicator you are disrespecting me. At that point the USS Monica goes on Defcon 1 status and launches verbal Tomahawks at the fool or fools in question.

I politely told him the first time I didn't appreciate being 'sirred'. When he did it the second time, had I been back in Da Ville, I would have politely gone verbally nuclear on his behind, found the manager, told them why and walked out. My hosts were appalled and not too thrilled about it either.

But my pissivity over the Afro-transphobic waiter lessened as the LITDOR gang surprised me with a t-shirt and other Long Island themed gifts since it was my first trip there.


I get dropped off at the hotel after 4 PM to take a nap. I'd been up at this point since 4 AM and definitely needed it. I managed to get almost two hours in before I was awakened by the alarm clock to get ready for the LITDOR service that was starting at 7 PM.

Arianna scooped me up and got me to the church for a LITDOR service was a wonderful blend of music, spoken personal testimonies by various LITDOR members and Native American spirituality.

Then it was my turn to do my speech after a wonderful introduction by Juli, who was at the IFGE convention in Philly for my 2006 Trinity acceptance speech that still gets positive commentary three years later.

I was also surprised and flattered to see a July 2007 poem that I'd written on TransGriot called 'Don't Disrespect Me' printed as part of the program.

Not sure if this keynote speech was on the level of the 2006 IFGE one, but the audience liked it, and that's all I really cared about. I was interrupted by applause once before I finished it.

After the names are read by LITDOR members from various corners of the room and the benediction by Rev. Bigelow, we close the service with a rendition of 'Amazing Grace' before Eileen and I jointly blew out the single large candle resting on the altar draped with a transgender flag different from the Monica Helms designed white pink and blue version to conclude the service.

I found out how much the attendees liked the speech at the reception. One person after another sought me out over the next two hours and told me me how much they enjoyed the speech, TransGriot, or both. I also had the interesting and humbling experience of being asked for my autograph by a Black transman named Christian. As I signed his program he expressed how proud he was to see me standing there and eloquently speak about our fallen brothers and sisters.

Ended up in some substantive conversations with many of the attendees on a wide variety of subjects before heading back to the hotel and get some sleep for the return trip back to Da Ville

Said my goodbyes to Eileen and quietly autographed the extra copy of the speech she had for me before I entered the Islip terminal. This time to avoid what happened in Louisville I made sure that any foundation garments I was wearing didn't have metal in them.

On my PHL layover ran into the same ground personnel who had kicked my Islip flight out the day before. I had a wonderful chat with them before I headed for my gate for my Louisville bound flight.

One of the cool things about the trans community is that your family expands, not contracts. I added some new family members and had a wonderful time in the process despite the solemn reason I was on Long Island in the first place.

Once again, I thank the LITDOR gang for inviting me to speak at their event. I knew I had a tough act to follow in Diego Sanchez and the other keynoters who have graced that event. Looking forward to hanging out with the LITDOR gang sometime and somewhere in the near future.

Leaving On A Jet Plane...To LI

I'm getting my beauty sleep as you read this right now because in a few hours I'll be rolling out of bed for a long day of travel and eventually being the keynote speaker at tonight's LI Transgender Day Of Remembrance event in Centerpoint, NY.

Looking forward to finally meeting Eileen and all the wonderful folks in LI.

If you're in the New York area and can get there, I'd like to meet and greet some of you wonderful people as well.

See you tonight.

One Speech Down, Another To Go

Now that a week has passed since I visited the Bryn Mawr campus, my attention is now focused on the speech I'm presently compiling. I've been graciously invited to deliver remarks for a Transgender Day of Remembrance event on Long Island.

This will be the third speech I've given at a TDOR event and as of yet haven't been invited to give one back home or in the birth state (hint, hint).

But when I do get those opportunities, one of the things I take into account when I'm compiling these speeches is why we're gathered there in the first place.

The Byrd-Shepard Hate Crimes bill will have been on the books for a few weeks by the time I stand up at the podium to deliver this next speech, but our work toward achieving full equality for transgender Americans will not be complete.

That sadly will be an ongoing but necessary project.

Looking forward to seeing you folks in Long Island on November 22.

Thanks Bryn Mawr!

Thanks to all the people who showed up at Thomas 224 for my speech and the dialogue we had afterward on trans issues.

It was the first time I'd ever set foot on a Seven Sisters campus, and it was wonderful getting to interact with the students, faculty, friends and allies.

Thanks for letting me know how much you appreciate what I do on TransGriot and the hospitality you showed me.

I also want to thank Women's Center director Nicole Matos and Nga Nguyen, a long list of people at Bryn Mawr and my home girl Dionne Stallworth for the several hours of Philly hospitality I got to spend with her. Too bad I can't be there for the panel discussion she's putting together on November 18 during TDOR week.

Despite the fact I forgot to keep up with a tradition I have of picking up a coffee mug from any school I do a speaking engagement at, I still had a wonderful day.

Thanks once again for the invitation, and I hope I have the honor and pleasure of gracing your campus again in the near future.

Gone To Bryn Mawr

Will be traveling all day to give my speech in the Thomas Library at 4 PM on the Bryn Mawr College campus in Bryn Mawr, PA.

My flight leaves Louisville at 5:50 AM EDT and I don't get back to Da Ville until 11:45 PM EDT, so as of midnight, the time I set this post to pop up, I'm getting my beauty sleep. (I love the auto post feature)

If I happen to find a computer on campus I can post from, I'll try to post some of my trip thoughts. If I don't, it's gonna have to wait until I get back to Da Ville.

Lord knows I'm going to have enough time on the flight back to write something.

So to the Bryn Mawr students, faculty and friends who will be there, looking forward to meeting y'all and having a thoughtful dialogue with you while I'm there.

On The Road Again

Well peeps, in less than 12 hours I'll be rolling toward our nation's capital to lobby in favor of ENDA and hate crimes.

So why am I taking a few days out of my schedule to lobby for these bills? Well, one of my guiding principles is to leave the world in a better position than when I arrived on the scene. I want the transkids who are now six and seven years old to have it better than we did. I don't want them having to wade through all the intolerance, ignorance and bull that we've have to endure. It's up to my generation to make sure that happens.

To borrow Dr. King's eloquent words, I want them to be judged on the content of their character. I want them to be able to achieve their dreams. I don't want them to be afraid to dream or live their lives like I was because I was fearful of what would happen if my gender issues were discovered. I want them to be able to contribute to American society without facing the resistance and limits that we've struggled to overcome. It's also another way I use my talents to give back and help build the community.

As much as I'm eagerly looking forward to lobbying on a Capitol Hill in which the Democrats are in control, it's the road trip I'm really psyched for. I've always liked road trips as I've stated on numerous occasions. In addition I relish the opportunity to see some old friends from around the nation and meet some new ones.

II think every American needs to get to Washington D.C. at least once in their lifetime. You need to see for yourselves how the legislative process works. There's nothing like being in DC and sitting in a hearing or a House or Senate session, watching the debates or talking to your congreessmember or senator. I've done that at the state and city council level but I really need to try to do it for the federal government level as well.

If I get access to a computer I'll try to update the blog and report to you TransGriot readers what's happening during Transgender Lobby Week. I'll be putting on my journalist cap and conducting a few interviews while I'm there as well.

Now I need to finish washing this last load of clothes and get some sleep. Got a long drive ahead of me.

The Houston Traffic Rules

TransGriot Note:This was posted to another group that I'm a member of and I found it hilarious. The original author is unknown. I've cleaned it up and added some things as well.


H-Town, Space City, the Bayou City, 3rd Coast, The Dirty 3rd or whatever you wanna call it.

1. You must learn to pronounce the city name. It is 'Hue-stun,' not 'Ewe-stun', or 'house-tun' You call it 'house-ton' and we know you're a Yankee or worse, from New York.

2. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Houston has its own version. The first one is hold on and pray. There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in Houston. We all drive like that.

3. All directions start with, "Go down to Loop 610"...which has no beginning and no end. Conversely, if you get lost, find Loop 610. 30 minutes later you'll end up in the part of town you wanted to be in or find the major street you were looking for.

4. The Chamber of Commerce calls getting through traffic..."a scenic drive."

5. The morning rush hour is from 6:00 AM to 10:00 AM. The evening rush hour is from 3:00 PM to 7:00 PM. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning.

6. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear-ended, cussed out and possibly shot. If you find yourself as the first car off the line, count to five when the light turns green before proceeding in order to avoid getting clobbered by someone running the red light on the other side.

7. Kuykendahl Road can ONLY be pronounced by a native Houstonian.

8. Construction on I-10, I-45, US 59 and Loop 610 is a generational way of life, an economic stimulant and a permanent form of entertainment.

9. All unexplained smells are explained by the phrases, "Oh, we must be in Pasadena!" , "God, I hate Baytown!" or "I must be near the Ship Channel."

10. If someone actually uses their turn signal it is either a factory defect, they just graduated from driver's ed or they just moved here.

11. All old ladies with blue hair in a pink Cadillac have total right-of-way.


12. The minimum acceptable speed on Loop 610 is 85 mph. Anything less is considered downright sissy. In turn, the minimum speed on Westheimer Road is at least 45 mph.

13. The rod iron on windows in east Houston is NOT ornamental.

14. Never stare at the driver of the car with the bumper sticker that says, "Keep honking, I'm reloading." In fact, don't honk at anyone.

15. If you're in the left lane and only going 70 mph in a 60 mph zone, people are not waving hello when they pass you.


16. The Sam Houston Tollway (Beltway 8) is our daily version of NASCAR. The Hardy Toll Road is our local version of the Autobahn.

17. If it's 100 degrees, Thanksgiving must be next weekend.

18. When in doubt, remember that all unmarked exits lead to either Dallas or Louisiana.

19. If you live in Katy or Spring and I live on the south side of Houston we'll never hang out.

20. The best thing about being drunk between 2-5 am is that Whataburger, Jack In The Box and Denny's all serve both breakfast and regular menus.

21. You can be pulled over by any police vehicle, even if you were just given a ticket.

22. You don't have to wait for an exit to get off a freeway. Just follow the ruts in the grass to the feeder road like everyone else. This is how Houston residents notify the Texas Department of Transportation where exits should have been built.

23. Some major crosstown streets in Houston have multiple names depending on what part of town you're in. Exhibit A: Westheimer Rd. turns into Elgin St. which becomes Lockwood Dr. when it passes the University of Houston.

24. If given directions that involve driving on freeways, we don't call them by their names. I-10 is the Katy/East Fwy, I-45 is the Gulf/North Fwy, US 290 is the Northwest Fwy, TX 288 is the South Fwy, US 59 is the Eastex/Southwest Fwy and Beltway 8 is the Sam Houston Tollway

25. Elsewhere, they are called frontage roads. Here in Houston we call them FEEDER roads. Those feeder roads also have U-turn lanes at major intersections. So don't give us blank stares when we say "Exit the feeder road and use the loop-de-loop"

If you've never lived here, most of this will sound utterly insane. But to all of us who were either born here or call Houston home, this is the truth and y'all know it!