Friday Mailbag, April 7th 2006

Three letters to kick this feature off: one sexy, one sweet, one sorrowful.

Hey Joe,

Just a quick note to tell you a thing that may make you giggle. My fuckbuddy and I picked up a guy online Saturday night and he was already on the way over when I realized I recognized his Manhunt pic from seeing it on your blog on your Frappr map. Not that I waste tons of time cruising Frappr maps or anything. Anyway, after we played for about an hour I said "I bet you read Joemygod" and he did the funniest doubletake. LOL. We decided you're probably a prick in real life but usually a good read.

(name withheld)

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Joe,

I gotta love anyone who feels the same way about Souvenirs as I do. It’s been my signature record my entire career and never fails to get me where I live. It’s also heartening to read that you truly understand what an emotional experience the dancefloor can be to anyone that can actually open up, listen and feel what is going on. Those moments when the room is unified… I call it the “universal mood”. I just wanted to let you know how good it made me feel to read what you wrote.

Best Regards, DJ Michael Fierman

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Morning Joe,

[T]oday I read your posts about Sullivan, and right wing conservatism and then found your story about very gay Terrence and I wondered about what coming out meant to you. In the midst of listening to the now ubiquitous Mr. Blunt singing "Goodbye my lover" backedited to cutscenes from Brokeback, I had a good cry and wondered what being gay meant to me and why I find it so hard.... which is actually easy to explain but rather more difficult to understand. My desperate question if you would allow someone you don't know at all to even pose it, was it never a stuggle for you? Did being gay sit so well with how you felt and what you wanted that you never wondered if maybe there was another way round? That sounds deeply closeted and I was, now sort of, but still unsure. Not that I'm gay. But that I'm screwed because of it. Anyway enough rambling, I'm sure you're flooded with enough rabid, anonymous emails to drive you crazy but thank you for your blog and for maybe listening.

Andrew

Andrew, thanks very much for your letter. I think I was luckier than most in that I never really anguished about my gayness per se, mostly I was tortured by how to put it into action. I wish I knew what to tell you to make things easier, other than telling you something like cliched like, "Those who mind, don't matter. Those who matter, don't mind." Maybe my readers can. By coincidence, next week happens to be a rather notable anniversary for me in that regard and I'll post something on that topic then, but I doubt that my teenage remembrances will do you much good today. Maybe it'll help us help you to hear some of the details of your situation.