Well, the old **it hit the fan for Tom Cruise this week.
Yesterday morning, a news outlet featured a videotape of the megastar, engaging in secret ceremonies behind closed doors at Scientology headquarters.
If the disgruntled former member of the cult, who released it, intended to "embarrass" Mr. Cruise, they accomplished that feat hands down!
In one shot, Tom enters an "S" meeting, stops to salute a fuzzy blow-up photo of the creator of the organization - Ron L. Hubbard - then proceeds onstage to acknowledge one of the upper echelon of the odd-ball group that raises eyebrows daily.
I surmise the curious elbow-lift infers that all Scientology enthusiasts are "foot soldiers" in the war against, what? Ignorance? Prejudice against the Church's "personality tests"? Overzealous critics harping about the fact that Scientology is not a religion?
Heh, in the inner recesses of my mind, I do seem to recall that Mr. Hubbard was a former Science Fiction writer. Isn't Scientology just a surreal fantasy, conjured up by a very active, demented imagination?
Worse yet, Tom was caught in the flesh, talking Scientologese!
Yup, he babbled with gushing enthusiasm about SP, and KSG, and all manner of things, hidden in a secret code. SP? "Suppress the people", is what it stands for, according to insiders.
And KSG? "Keep Scientology Going" apparently.
Well, if you have a deranged mind, to.
Do you suppose they have a secret handshake too?
I must say, I was a bit envious of that Gold Medallion swinging lavishly around Tom's squeaky-clean neck a few months ago...an award, you say, for his worthwhile contributions to the sect - um - Church?
To be fair to the star, and in a bold-faced effort to gain a different perspective on 'em, I inputted the word Scientology into the online dictionary at Webster's web site. The word isn't even listed, let alone mentioned in a possible list of suspects.
As I was preparing this post, a 20/20 promo for a segment on the "cruiser", sprang across the screen...so, I was inclined to tune in.
Clips catching Tom demonizing psychiatry were downright scary - especially in view of the fact - he alleges that scientologists have the “the authority".
On what?
If this revelation (no connection to the scriptures) wasn't enough to hurl Cruise fanatics over the brink, they hit bullion when Andrew Morton - who released an unauthorized biography this week on the diminutive actor - was on hand to toss in his two cents worth.
"Tom thinks they are super beings," he actually opined with a straight face.
Ironically, the interviewer, added,
"After observing Mr. Cruise the past few months, it appears to me that he needs some psychiatric therapy."
Ouch!
If asked, maybe Dr. Phil will step in and lend a hand.
On a morning show, the reporter noted that word from Cruise's camp is that any individuals posting the video on their web site, will face litigation.
Why don't you just zap 'em with your super powers, Tom?
Andrew Morton's timely tome apparently focuses on the childhood years, as well. The insightful writer uncovered gems like...the fact that Tom collected model airplanes (Top Gun, right?) and played the "sun" in a 5th grade pageant.
As to the quirky, early stint on stage, a former teacher noted that,
"Even 30 years later, it still gives me goose bumps (thinking about it)."
When it was also revealed that Tom Cruise once impersonated Woody Woodpecker, a Bay Area Reporter quipped,
"We'd bet his Woody is memorable."
My money says Cruise suffers from a Napoleon (small man's) complex.
Tom, psychiatrists usually prefer a horizontal position on the couch...