Ever read those close captions that appear at the bottom of your new-fangled plasma TV?
Well, for some inexplicable reason, my focus turned away from the images the other night (some silly bozo must have sauntered onto the screen and distracted me for a second or two) and I noticed something was amiss...
Now and then, the translation was inclined to get twisted and mangled; subsequently, the end results were oftentimes hilarious - if not downright - disastrous.
For instance, when Dave Letterman announced that John Edwards would be appearing on the show the following evening, the Democrat's "John Hancock" was translated as "Swron Edwards". Maybe, the minions at NBC, were referring to his feminine side?
Guess not, because the glitches persisted.
On Jay Leno - the word "Okay" - was transformed into "Oh, Goldy". Jay's deep passionate feelings about a guest, slipped out, perhaps?
The Patriots were hailed as the "Theatriots" (in reference to the Superbowl's wild and wholly beer busts?), while the ever-present term on voters minds these days - the word "politics" - was transformed into a shorter form (for simplicity sake, I guess) to "polics". Maybe the producers were shooting for colonics?
But the one to beat the band (the "boys in the band", no doubt) was the one that made the hysterical reference to a "rim shot".
If you don't know what "rimming" is - just ask any gay man - and he'll enlighten you in graphic detail, no doubt.
I wonder, is some gremlin playing tricks on the late-night talk show hosts, or is the slip-up attributed to faulty translator oversight?
On the plus side, if you get bored with the show, you can always pretend you're Scientologist - Tom Cruise - and craft some clever phrases to go along with the mis-caps.
Now that's, risky business!